It happens to all of us.  No matter how happy and positive we try to be, sometimes we just have bad days.  You’re late because you accidentally stain your clothes while eating breakfast, then your car doesn’t start.  Someone cuts you off in traffic and you give them the finger only to see, it was your boss.  You find out your best friend at work gets the promotion you’ve been working so hard towards.  You find out your child has been bullied and worse yet, it’s by a kid you encouraged your child to be friends with.  Whatever it is that causes our bad days, we have to remember - we always have a choice as to HOW we REACT and FEEL.

Okay, it feels good to get angry or even feel sorry for ourselves, at least for a moment.  After all, that’s what makes us human right?   Bottling up our feelings is never healthy and often doesn’t turn out well.  So what can we do?  Here’s an easy 4 step process that I think may help you.  I still have to remind myself all the time to use it, but when I do, it really does help.

STEP 1:  FEEL

If you want to yell, then yell.  If you want to cry, then cry.  Whatever it is that you feel, let yourself feel it.  Just remember not to harm anyone or their ears while you’re going through “your process”.  And after this, remember to move on to the next step.  We wouldn’t want you to get stuck here, now would we?

STEP 2: RELEASE, LET IT GO

You are no longer in that moment, feeling all those crazy emotions, at least not if you’ve done the first step well.  Now let go of all those feelings. Visualize all those feelings just floating away. It’s now time to move on.

STEP 3: DECIDE

How do you WANT to feel now?  Most of us want to feel happy again.  Decide what you want to feel and then move to STEP 4 and  make it happen.

STEP 4: LAND SOMEWHERE GOOD

Do something to get back to feeling what you want to feel.  For example, If you want to land in a happy place again, then do something that will make you laugh and bring you joy, so long as it’s healthy.   You could:

• Watch something funny  like your favorite comedian or comedy TV show

• Play with your kids or your pets - they always make me feel better now matter how upset or angry I get

• Listen to music that makes you want to dance, inspires you, takes you to a really good time in your life

• Do something you find fun or relaxing like reading a book, gardening or playing a sport

The key is to do something that makes you FEEL good and FEEL happy again.

The more we do this - recognize when we’re upset, angry, sad or just feeling bad and follow these steps, the more likely this will become a healthy habit for us.  Before you know it, you won’t even have to think about these steps, you’ll just auto-pilot into doing them.  Wouldn’t that be great?

Before you know it, you’ll have bad days but spend very little time feeling bad.  Instead, you’ll spend most of your days feeling good…and like magnets, feelings attract “like” circumstances.  So the more you feel good, the more good will come into your life.  For more on that, I suggest you learn more about the “law of attraction”.  There’s both a great book and a movie on that called “The Secret”.